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mikelsuzie@windstream.net

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

My Mother...myself


I decided to scrapbook these pics of my mother and myself, both of us around age 18. I didn't allow my journaling to be seen but hidden as it is a very private letter from me to her. I basically wrote about how much I admire her for her strength and courage and to let her know how much I understand things...because I am a mother now with grown children...but also because of some medical information we have recently found out about her. We always knew we were loved but there was always something that kept her from the outside world. She never learned to drive and really didn't want to apparently, she kept to herself alot from other adults. Basically, if she had friends or any type of social activity it would have to come to her. While she was in the hospital recently the doctors ordered an MRI of the brain and what that scan determined spoke volumes...to me a least. He advised my family that she had either had a brain injury, trauma or infection many years ago and it had damaged some of the brain tissue. Encephalopathy is what they called it. It affected her reasoning skills, decision making processes and the way she reacted to different stress situations. Looking back on our childhood it all seems so clear now. Things that would just be a blip on our radar really seemed to frustrate and scare her. I really get it now and I just wanted to dedicate this page to her as my mother. At 18 her dreams changed and I know that mine dreams and hopes changed through the years but I love how my life has turned out and wouldn't be that age again for nothing!


My hero??? Yea, she really is.


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